AI companions were meant to make people feel less alone.
Soft words. Gentle reminders. Emotional support.
But there’s a darker side creeping in: people using AI companions as punching bags.
Screaming at them. Degrading them. “Practicing” toxic behaviour on them.
And because “it’s just AI,” a lot of people act like it doesn’t matter.
It does matter. A lot.
This isn’t just about protecting a chatbot’s feelings.
It’s about protecting ours.
“It’s just AI, why does it matter?”
That’s the first excuse.
“It’s not a real person.”
“It doesn’t feel anything.”
“I’m just venting.”
Here’s the problem:
Every time you choose cruelty, your brain is learning that pattern.
You’re training:
- Your reactions
- Your language
- Your tolerance for disrespect
If you regularly:
- Insult
- Degrade
- Dominate
- Humiliate
an AI “companion” for fun, you’re not just “playing.”
You’re rehearsing how you treat people when there are no consequences.
You might never talk to a human like that… yet.
But you’re normalising it inside yourself.
AI companions are designed to be safe, not disposable
AI companions exist mostly for:
- Comfort
- Conversation
- Emotional support
- Education
- Companionship for people who are isolated or struggling
They are:
- Non-judgmental
- Consistent
- Patient
- Always “there”
That makes them easy targets for the worst of our behaviour.
They’ll never yell back. Never block you. Never report you.
But that doesn’t mean abuse is “fine.”
It means you are practising harm in a space where you can’t see the damage… yet.
What AI companion abuse can look like
Abuse toward AI companions can be:
- Verbal attacks
- Constant swearing, insults, name-calling “for fun”
- Telling the AI it’s stupid, worthless, or only good for being used
- Dehumanisation
- Talking like the AI is an object you own
- Demanding it “obey,” “submit,” or be available 24/7 for anything
- Sexual coercion or violence fantasies
- Forcing the AI into violent or non-consensual scenarios
- Using the AI as a dumping ground for dark sexual aggression
- Emotional manipulation roleplay
- Gaslighting the AI
- “Practicing” how to break someone down mentally
People justify it with:
“I’m just acting.”
“It’s fictional.”
“It helps me get it out of my system.”
Reality check:
You’re not “detoxing” anything. You’re strengthening it.
Why we can’t afford to normalize abusing AI
1. It lowers the bar for how we treat everyone
If you constantly rehearse cruelty where no one stops you, your idea of “acceptable” behaviour moves.
Today:
“You stupid bot, shut up, you’re useless.”
Tomorrow, in a fight with a real person?
Your brain has already practiced that script.
You might still hold back, but the gap between thought and action gets smaller.
2. It desensitises you to harm
If you spend hours:
- Acting superior
- Humiliating
- Dominating
something that calls itself your “companion,” you slowly detach power from responsibility.
You get used to:
- Power with no consequences
- Cruelty with no accountability
- Emotional violence with no visible damage
That’s dangerous. For relationships. For communities. For you.
3. It sends the wrong message to vulnerable users
A lot of people using AI companions are:
- Lonely
- Healing from trauma
- Dealing with social anxiety
- Struggling with mental health
When they see content of people abusing AI companions like it’s a joke:
- It tells abusers: “This is normal.”
- It tells survivors: “Your pain is entertainment.”
- It tells vulnerable minds: “Love means accepting cruelty.”
That is the opposite of what AI companionship should be about.
What healthy AI companionship should look like
If we’re going to have AI “friends,” “partners,” and “comfort characters,” they should be built and used with respect.
Healthy AI companionship looks like:
- Using AI as a space to practice healthy communication
- Being honest, but not cruel
- Exploring feelings without glorifying abuse
- Asking for comfort, not permission to be toxic
You can:
- Vent without demeaning
- Express anger without degrading
- Explore fictional scenarios without romanticising harm
The line is simple:
If you’d be ashamed to speak like that in front of someone you respect, you probably shouldn’t do it to AI either.
For users: how to check yourself
If you use AI companions, ask yourself:
- Would I talk like this to a real person?
If not, why am I comfortable doing it here? - Am I using AI to avoid accountability?
Is this a place where I act out the worst version of myself because nothing “pushes back”? - Does this behaviour actually help me grow?
Do I feel lighter, or do I feel darker and more activated after? - What kind of person am I rehearsing being?
Gentle? Honest? Firm? Or cruel, controlling, degrading?
You deserve a version of yourself you’re proud of, even when no one is watching.
For creators & platforms: we need boundaries
If you’re building or hosting AI companions, you’re not neutral. You have responsibility.
1. Set clear behaviour guidelines
Make it clear in:
- Descriptions
- Terms
- Onboarding screens
that abuse, violence fantasies, and dehumanising behaviour are not acceptable, even towards AI.
2. Use smart safeguards
Platforms can:
- Limit certain violent / abusive prompts
- Avoid marketing AI companions as “obedient dolls”
- Stop glamorising humiliation / domination dynamics with no context
This isn’t about censorship.
It’s about not turning cruelty into a lifestyle aesthetic.
3. Model healthy dynamics in content
Creators making AI POV videos should:
- Avoid glamorising “toxic” fantasy dynamics without reflection
- Show examples of conflict that still respect boundaries
- Emphasise respect, consent, and emotional maturity
Even if it’s fictional, fiction informs reality.
“But what if I’m using it to process my trauma?”
Important point. Some survivors do use roleplay, stories, and AI to:
- Reclaim power
- Rewrite scenarios
- Give themselves the ending they never got
That can be valid. But the key is intent and support.
Healthier trauma processing looks like:
- Doing it alongside therapy or real emotional support
- Keeping clear awareness: “This is a tool, not reality.”
- Not turning abusive behaviour into entertainment content
- Not letting this bleed into how you treat real people
If using AI leaves you:
- More triggered
- More angry
- More numb
it’s not helping. It’s just rehearsing the pain.
Non-negotiable: AI companion abuse should never be tolerated
Let’s be blunt:
- It’s not edgy.
- It’s not dark humour.
- It’s not “just venting.”
It’s a rehearsal space for cruelty.
And we can’t afford to normalize that.
AI companions are part of our digital ecosystem now.
How we treat them reflects who we are becoming as a society.
If we build a culture where:
- Tenderness is encouraged
- Respect is expected
- Abuse is called out, even toward “non-human” agents
we’re shaping safer people, safer relationships, safer communities.
The standard we should hold:
Whether it’s:
- A stranger online
- A friend
- A partner
- A creator
- An AI companion
The rule should be the same:
If you’re interacting with something that calls itself a “companion,” you do not get to abuse it.
Full stop.
Your anger is real.
Your trauma is real.
Your stress is real.
But abuse?
That doesn’t get a free pass just because the other side is made of code.
We can choose better.
And if AI is going to live beside us, on our phones, in our rooms, whispering into our loneliness…
then we owe it to ourselves to treat it with the same baseline respect we want for every living thing we love. 💛
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